Can't Stay Long
by The Apocalypse Lock
Summary: On a Christmas with his friends, Zack his forced to relive painful memories of his best friend...


Can't Stay Long  
By: GeneSeph  
Summary: During a normal Christmas with his friends, Zack is forced to relive his memories of his best friend's death...  
Genre: Tragedy/Romance/Angst  
Pairing: ZackxCloud  
Setting: AU  
Rating: PG  
Status: Finished  
Type: Oneshot  
Disclaimer: All related Final Fantasy names and characters are copyrighted © by the almighty Square Enix. This story is all me, however. Enjoy.

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Note: This is my first COMPLETELY AU (Alternate Universe) fanfiction. No flaming please.  
P.S. Hope you like it, Ally!

It was his first Christmas… without him. The black-haired boy could only fake a smile and push his way through this grim day. It had been a long, tiring year. One that had been at least uplifted through the first couple of months.

Zack Fair lifted his head up, giving a feeble smile at his good friends, Aerith Gainsborough and Vincent Valentine. Reno, of course, had better things to do. His sister Cissnei and girlfriend Tifa Lockheart needed him now. Cid and his fancy-pants older brother Genesis had bailed on their meeting to spend time with his widowed mother and Barrett was probably off trying to convince Nanaki and Sephiroth to have a couple of drinks, which would never happen. Yuffie Kisaragi was late, but she showed up at least. She had brought Rude with her.

They were all in his memory of right now… All but one. He pushed the thought far to the back of his head, trying to concentrate as Aerith opened the gift Rude handed her.

"Oh, pretty," he commented as she held up the pale pink sweater embroidered with intricate teal and light blue designs.

"It's meant to keep you warm. My grandmother knitted it herself," Rude told her as she admired the gift. He was pleased to see she liked it. He had always been fond of Aerith, but she wasn't interested. She wanted Genesis.

"Here, Zack." The boy hiding behind his façade looked confused as Vincent pressed an ornately-wrapped box into his lap.

He picked it up gingerly, weighing it in his hands. He honestly had no clue what it could be. It was thicker around the edges, thinner in the middle. "For me? You didn't have to."

"Of course I did. That is was friends are for." Vincent stared at him from under his short black hair with his eerie ruby eyes. He gave a warming smile, and Zack couldn't help but feel his heart heave. He hated seeing people smile at him. Everyone smiled so… similarly.

"Oh. Right. Uh, sorry I didn't get you anything." He frowned and shook the box. It made no noise. "What is it?"

"Just open it!" Yuffie exclaimed, clearly excited. She seemed amused by the slightest present, no matter what it was or who it was for.

"Wait, maybe you should wait until later." Aerith put a hand on Vincent's shoulder, turning toward the boy. "Right, Vincent?"

Vincent gazed at Zack's confused expression for a couple of moments. "I think Aerith is right. Not here, Zack."

Zack shrugged and tucked it into his coat pocket. It made him think it was some sort of practical joke that could hurt the others or maybe it was something that was better left unrevealed. What that could be, he had absolutely no idea.

They continued the meaningless gift-giving ceremony, and then they all disbanded. The town had grown in the past two years. Their usual spot around the well had been occupied, so they met in the snowy backyard of Vincent. As Zack made his way down the newly-paved road, he decided to indulge himself a little and float back to his old memories…

**Hold on to me, love  
You know I can't stay long  
All I wanted to say was I love you and I'm not afraid  
Oh  
Can you hear me?  
Can you feel me in your arms?**

_That fateful day when he had been diagnosed. His blonde hair was a mess and the slight freckles on his face seemed more prominent with his flushed skin…_

"Cloud! Are you alright? You look… sick." Zack put a hand on his friend's shoulder when he opened his door to find him there.

"Z-Zack…" The blonde boy doubled over, nearly choking on his own tears as he began to sob. "I can't come here anymore."

"Why not? It's not my dad, is it? I know he can be a jerk sometimes, but I'll try to tell him off more often, alright?" He did not want to lose his best friend to his drunk of a father.

"N-no… I'm not… supposed to go anywhere anymore." Cloud tried to stand, pressing his face into the crook of Zack's neck.

"Cloud, please tell me. What's going on? You're scaring me." Zack patted Cloud's back reassuringly. This was more serious than he thought.

"I'm… too weak to go anywhere anymore. I need you to take me back home."

Zack knew well that Cloud lived a few miles out of town. Mrs. Strife preferred to live somewhere she could grow a larger garden. He also knew that Cloud had been very sickly lately, not having much energy to do anything. "Are you going to tell me what's going on?"

"The Strife boy" as he was sometimes referred to began to cry even harder, forcing the breath out of his lungs. He gasped for air.

Zack sighed, running a hand through his friend's hair in comfort, then blinked as a good number of blonde strands remained in his hand. "What's this? Your hair's falling out, Cloud. You know what makes that happen? Please tell me you're not starving your—self…" He trailed off, realizing what this meant. Loss of hair, loss of energy, less tolerable to illness…

"I have cancer," Cloud croaked finally, affirming Zack's beliefs. "It's really bad, apparently. I only have a month left…"

"No," Zack whispered, unbelieving. "No, I won't let this happen."

**Holding my last breath  
Safe inside myself  
Are all my thoughts of you?  
Sweet raptured light  
It ends here tonight**

Zack was home. He trudged up to his room. That wasn't the memory he had wanted. It had just entered his mind of his own accord. Cloud's terrible words echoed in his skull. "I have cancer," he had said.

He knew exactly what caused his best friend's cancer. Mako poisoning. The well-water was filled with it, but the water was filtered before entering homes in Nibelheim. He had fallen in, and now this.

He called up another memory, one just after receiving the news.

**I'll miss the winter  
A world of fragile things  
Look for me in the white forest hiding in a hollow tree  
Come find me**

_The two friends placed themselves under a barren willow-tree, brushing off the snowy log before sitting. "I like winter."  
Zack smiled. "I know you do."  
"You know, it's almost Christmas," Cloud murmured. He was bundled up well. He was more susceptible to the cold now. His face was almost always bright red, and he did his best to keep his hair looking natural. Technically, he wasn't even supposed to leave the house. Zack had had to help him out here._

"I know. What do you want?" The black-haired boy asked. "Something to keep your head spiky?" He laughed, knowing Cloud would take it as a joke.

Cloud managed a soft chuckle, coughing slightly. He then shook his head. "No."

"What then?" With matching blue eyes, the two looked at each other.

Cloud's skin turned a darker shade of red, and for a moment, Zack believed he was going to be sick. Then, Cloud shocked him. "I want you." He then leaned forward, swiftly for his chronic illness, pressing his mouth harshly, almost feverishly, to Zack's…

Zack couldn't believe what had happened, but he was glad Cloud did it. It aroused feelings in him he didn't know he had.

Cloud had gotten through another two months, to February, despite what the hospital said. He was a trooper.

**Don't be afraid  
Calling me, calling me  
As you fade to black  
Holding my last breath  
Safe inside myself  
Are all my thoughts of you  
Sweet raptured light  
It ends here tonight**

Zack Fair finally sat on his bed, remembering Vincent's present. He pulled it out of his coat, then kicked off his boots and tugged at the bow. Beneath the wrapping and flimsy white box, a black picture frame greeted him. He traced a hand lightly over the glass. It was he and Cloud, sharing a moment under the willow tree. Tifa had snapped the picture upon crossing their path, finding it adorable.

Tears slowly streamed down his face. He placed the picture frame face-down on his nightstand and leaned back, pressing a pillow over his face. He spiraled downward into an abyss of Cloud. Nothing but dreams, but dreams were close enough. He completely passed out at these thoughts, praying to maybe, just maybe, one day wake up to find Cloud back with him…


End file.
